As I sat down to create today’s video and blog post, a curious thing happened. My mind went blank. My brain was encased in ice. I had the urge to do ANYTHING other than my work. Clean the bathroom, fold the laundry, let’s do it.

I was experiencing a phenomenon I’ve come to call ‘Resistance.’ Steven Pressfield describes this concept in depth in his book, ‘The War of Art.’ It’s a must-read if you want to improve your life in any form.

We experience resistance when we try to do anything that moves us from a lower plane of existence to a higher plane. Have you ever found yourself eating chocolate cake on day three of your diet? Have you been gung-ho about a resolution for the New Year only to be back in your old habits by February? Started any kind of creative project and had a tough time moving forward?

If so, you’ve met your own Resistance.

Resistance is a tricky character and manifests itself in various ways. Procrastination is one of Resistance’s favorite tactics. Self-doubt, comparing yourself to others, and apathy are also tools in Resistance’s arsenal. Because Resistance is so shady, I associate it with the Devil card from the Tarot.

Despite this association, it’s important to remember that Resistance is not an ‘evil’ force. Resistance is simply a force within us that wants to maintain the status quo. Resistance likes things how they are. Resistance wants you to remain complacent.

It’s helpful to think of Resistance as a force. This makes it into something tangible, something we can begin to understand. I was dealing with my own Resistance for years before I had the terminology to articulate my experience. I mistakenly thought I was lazy. I felt guilty. I thought I didn’t want things bad enough.

None of this was true. I was just facing massive Resistance.

In fact, feeling guilty and berating yourself only makes things worse. Resistance feeds on this kind of drama.

 

 

Here’s the bad news: Resistance doesn’t magically go away. Every time I sit down to work on my novel or create content for Happy Fish Tarot, I must face my own Resistance. Steven Pressfield says that the more important a project is to our evolution, the stronger Resistance we will experience.

Here’s the good news: you can still do great things despite the presence of Resistance. The first step is simply having a name for your experience. This lets you stop thinking there is something wrong with you. When you’re tempted to stray from your path, procrastinate, or give up, you can now think to yourself:

This is Resistance.

It isn’t as scary when it has a name.

What can we do about Resistance? Here’s the number one, super-uber-Resistance-facing-strategy: just keep going. It’s going to take all the strength you can muster. Sometimes it will feel like you’re dragging yourself through the mud. That’s okay. That’s normal. Sit down and do your work. As they say, feel the fear and do it anyway.

Here’s some even better news. We all have access to forces that are the opposite of Resistance, and just as strong. Steven Pressfield refers to these as angels and muses. You can use whatever language you’re comfortable with.

These are the forces that want to foster your creativity. They want to lift you up. Whisper ideas into your ears. Guide you towards what you need. They want to fuel you in moving to a higher plane of existence.

Resistance may see unsurmountable, but it never is. Call in your guides. Assemble your angels. If that seems too ‘out there’, draw upon your higher nature or your inner genius. I’ve taken on the Star card as the representation of my Inspiration, and I like to keep this card propped up next to me as I write. I ask the Star to give me the light to continue on despite whatever tricks Resistance tries to throw at me.

Don’t underestimate the power of your muses. They can kick Resistance’s ass.
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This is barely scraping the surface of my thoughts on Resistance. It’s a hairy, nuanced topic. I’ll be discussing this more in the future.

Until then, go forth to the battlefield and walk with your muses.

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A few moons ago I was stuck, frozen, listless. I wanted to live creatively. I wanted to write and dye my hair and tell the truth and be a general badass. But I was not taking any action. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was afraid (terrified) of letting myself really want what I wanted. Wanting something makes you vulnerable. Wanting something means you run the risk of not getting it.

When I couldn’t take the pain any longer, I was compelled to sit down and write a bucket list. I’d never done so before, and it took all the strength I could muster to ignore the voice in my head telling me that this act was pointless.

When I finished writing, a veil was lifted in my consciousness. A block I had been harboring for years had been loosened. I knew this was a significant act, but I couldn’t articulate why until a few years later when I discovered Danielle LaPorte and heard her talk about giving yourself permission to want what you want.

That’s what I had done when I wrote a list of things I wanted to accomplish, achieve and experience.

I had given myself permission to actually want what I wanted.

 

 

Immense masses of the human population prevent themselves from really, truly owning their desires. They tell themselves what they want is unrealistic, immature, impossible, selfish. People who could bring forth joy, healing and innovation are unable to take the first step because they can’t give themselves permission to want what they want.

Some of us manage to go half-in on our desires. We put our feet in the water, but we’re cautious. We stay distant and aloof to protect ourselves. We play coy. We are diluted. This is a game I’ve mastered, and it can go on for a lifetime. But if you’re not fully owning your desires, you’re not potent. And if you’re not potent, you’re only half alive.

The magic happens when you stand headfirst under the waterfall, immersed in your longing.

Own what you want, name it, claim it, allow it. Even if only to yourself.
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This gives you the fuel you need to start the slow climb of making your desires your reality.

Let’s get to the core of the matter: we’re afraid of wanting. Wanting makes you vulnerable. You’re open to rejection. You might look like an idiot. People might laugh. You might fail epically. You might succeed wildly.

It is fucking terrifying to give yourself permission to want. Take it from me. I know, honey, I know. Even if we’re brave enough to give ourselves permission to want what we want, we’re still not guaranteed to get it. You can feel that desire – feel that yearning, craving, longing – you can feel it with every fibre of your being and still never see it come to fruition. And what then?

It has taken me this long to realize that my self-worth is not wrapped up in getting what I want. My novel might stagnate, my business might fail, people might talk, I might go broke. And that’s okay. I am always, and you are always, a glorious, shining, worthy soul.

Be bold. Be potent. Feel it. Allow yourself to want what you want.
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Look your blocks, fears and weaknesses in the eye. If you’re able to take this risk, you’re in for the ride of a lifetime. Hang on tight.

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