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Hey! I'm Carrie: tarot reader, mentor & ponderer of life lessons.

I am here to encourage you to live deeply, ask the right questions, navigate inner turmoil, and align with your creative bad-assery. This happens through private tarot readings, one-on-one mentoring and my weekly blog posts.

I write about tarot, creativity and self-discovery every Tuesday on the blog. There's exclusive content in my free newsletter as well, so sign up via the form to the right.

If you wanna get in touch, reach out to hello@carriemallon.com. You can also hang out with me on Instagram for tarot wisdom and the occasional cat picture!

Cheers to the journey,


Tarot just bitch slapped me about my upper limit problems

February 21st, 2017

A couple of days ago I felt inspired to give myself a reading with the Fountain Tarot. I didn’t have a set focus area, I just had this strong intuitive sensation that I’d get a really powerful message. I turned over my cards, expecting to have an instant connection with the insight they would bring forward.

I drew the Six of Wands, the Six of Pentacles, and the Hanged Man, all in reverse. I turned the cards around, telling myself I wouldn’t use reversals since I’m still getting used to this deck (I later realized this was a mistake – the cards were reversed for a reason).

Uhhmmm…well, at this point, my intuition broadcast crickets. I stared at the cards, running over various textbook interpretations in my brain, but nothing seemed right. I felt disappointed – when I get that sensation that a reading is about to be really powerful, it’s never been wrong before. But I thought maybe this time it was.

This gave me an unsettled feeling. My rational mind assured me that this was all because I was working with a new deck, but deep down I felt like there was SOMETHING right in front of my face that I was missing. I even put the call out on Instagram to have people chime in with their thoughts on the reading! I got relevant and helpful comments there, each of which served as a compass to point me closer to my own understanding, but I still wasn’t quite there.

The next day, as I was preparing breakfast and not thinking about tarot whatsoever, the message from this reading suddenly CAME to me, crystal clear: I’ve got an upper limit problem.

There is a book about this topic, I haven’t read it (yet). But here’s my understanding of how this works: we all have an unconscious limit of how much “good stuff” we think we deserve. When we start having some success that approaches these unconscious limits of what we believe we should receive, we halt our own progress without realizing we are doing so. We start sabotaging ourselves, effectively suspending our ability to make further progress.

Well, holy damn fuck. THIS is what the cards were trying to tell me: The Six of Wands showed some of the good stuff and success I’ve recently experienced. The Six of Wands showed how I’ve been pressing up against my own limits of how much good stuff I’m capable of receiving. And the Hanged Man showed how this has put me into a pattern of stasis. The reversals hinted at why I had such a hard time circling in on the message – my conscious mind was still resisting acknowledging that this has been happening.

Once I’d been smacked over the head with the revelation that I’m experiencing an upper limit problem, so many things made sense. Here’s just one example.

When I offered my New Year tarot readings at the beginning of the year, they sold really well. Like, WAY better than I expected. It was awesome and amazing, and I was so grateful. I was riding the high of success, doing the work that I love to do, and feeling like my business was reaching a new level of goodness.

But then, during the last week of completing my purchased readings, I got sick. I hardly ever get sick, and when I do it usually just lasts a couple of days. But not this time! Nope, I was knocked completely on my ass for several days, and even once I could function again it took an entire MONTH before I was back at 100%. This lingering illness made it so I was incapable of taking the momentum at work in my business and channeling it into further good stuff.

Now, I’m not saying that colds aren’t caused by germs and whatever else. But I can’t help but believe that this lingering illness was linked to my upper limit problem. At an unconscious level, I saw that I was succeeding, and that success was getting too close to my unconscious allocation of what I deserve. And so I got sick, in order to stay in my status-quo level of success.

Your unconscious upper limits are established in various ways. They might be influenced by your innate personality, the things you learned from society as a child, your fears and ego, your karma, and so on. Considering where your upper limits come from can certainly be useful, but it’s even more useful to focus on how you can move through them.

I’ve encountered upper limit problems before and managed to transcend them. But the thing about upper limit problems is that they tend to just keep on coming. It’s kind of like leveling up in an endless video game. You pass one level boss, but then you have to get past another, and another, and another. That’s how upper limits are.

Realizing that you have an upper limit problem is only the first step – but it’s a pretty powerful step, and sometimes it’s actually the HARDEST step. Now that I’ve completed this step (go me!), here’s how I’m planning to proceed.

I’m going to start by continuing to make my unconscious upper limits known to my conscious mind. This will happen through journaling, more tarot pulls, dreamwork and meditation. Once I have greater clarity about what my current limits are, I will continue the work to rewire them. This happens through affirmations, energy work, and catching myself in self-sabotage and redirecting my behavior.

Working through upper limits, like any type of self-discovery process, is complicated and unique to us as individuals. It’s a tough road to travel, but it’s the road that leads to a more meaningful, empowered and magical life. And so here I go, devoting to that road once again.

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14 questions to ask yourself (and your cards) about love

February 14th, 2017


Dreaming Way Tarot

 

So, to be honest, I’m not that into Valentine’s Day. But I AM into the concept of LOVE! You know, though, love is a complicated and open-ended topic. On Valentine’s Day we tend to focus more on romantic love, but it’s important to also consider the more expansive implications of love. This can be tricky to do, though, as we don’t even have one set “definition” of love to get the inquiry going. Exploring your relationship with the concept of love sounds worthwhile in theory, but where to begin?

With this query in mind, I came up with a list of questions to inspire you (and me) to explore the concept of love, using tarot as a prompt. To get the most out of this exercise, I suggest drawing cards AND journaling on each of the questions. I’m going to be drawing cards at random for these prompts, but you could also consciously select cards to answer each question, if you’d prefer.

I’ll share my cards and thoughts with you here, but of course yours will likely look quite different from mine. Love does not have one fixed definition, we are all touched by this concept and interact with this concept in different ways. I hope you’ll try this for yourself and that these questions might give you a more holistic understanding of your relationship with love.

What can help me define love?

I drew the Three of Wands.

Love is the force that gently draws me forward. Love invites me to explore the world, to explore my own psyche. Love is what keeps me facing the sun, facing possibilities. I can define love as the energy that points me towards what is interesting and powerful and worth discovering in this life.

How can I increase my ability to receive love?

I drew the Three of Swords.

Love and pain are intrinsically linked. If I want to receive love in deep and profound ways, I have to accept that I will also receive pain in deep and profound ways. When I try to filter out pain and only receive love, I weaken my ability to perceive any emotions. As Khalil Gibran said: the more deeply that sorrow caves into your being, the more joy you can contain.

How can I increase my ability to give love?

I drew the Five of Wands.

Instead of being nit-picky, I can work on accepting and loving people for who they are. It’s important for me to check my tendencies to lash out at the perceived flaws I see in other people. To give more love, I need to accept that sometimes the people I love the most are also the people who can really drive me nuts. People are not only deserving of love when they live up to some idealized version of themselves that I’ve built up in my head. Instead, I can give more love by being willing to give love even when I perceive people as being difficult and annoying.

What might stand in the way of love?

I drew the Five of Cups reversed.

Unconscious feelings and beliefs telling me that I am not worthy of love stand in the way of love. The fear of sadness, the lengths we got to avoid sadness – these things are more effective barriers to love than the actual sadness itself. Sometimes despair can feel very pressing, the experience of despair can be so visceral that it seems as if love will never again break through. But love always does break through, and is present even as a barely discernible undertone even when despair feels utterly prominent.

What is unexpected about love?

I drew the High Priestess.

Love is a great shapeshifting mystery. There is more that is UNEXPECTED about love than that which is expected. Love deftly moves beyond expectations. Love is not restricted to cliches or traditions. Love is a pulse, a heartbeat in my individual consciousness that mirrors a pulse in the universe itself. How this pulse manifests is infinitely variable, and almost always unexpected.

How might hurt and love be reconciled?

I drew the Two of Pentacles.

This echoes the themes brought up by the Three of Swords. Hurt and love must coexist. One cannot be banished without dragging the other one along. I can work on consistently evaluating how I am managing both of these energies. I can become more aware of which I am paying more attention to in a given moment, I can attempt to ensure that they are working together instead of at odds within me.

In what ways has love transformed me?

I drew the Six of Swords reversed.

Love has taken me to hell and back. Love has thrown me for a loop. Love has led me to great confusion and powerful insights alike. Love has asked me to go beyond the peripheries of my own awareness and consider the greater linking of all things. Love is taking me for a ride, and that ride is called life.

How has my understanding of love evolved?

I drew the Nine of Wands reversed.

Without realizing it, I used to approach love with great caution. I didn’t want to bring too much of myself forward. I didn’t want to risk getting hurt. And so I showed up in measured ways, cautiously assessing the situation. Instead of letting myself tune into my true self and softly unfold, I approached love with calculated strategy. I didn’t know I was doing so.

Now, my understanding has evolved. Love is not about avoiding parts of myself. Love is not about presenting a facade. Love is not about carefully measuring out how much of ME to bring to the table. Instead, love is about liberation. Love is about expression. Love is about being who I am, being open and curious about who others are, and leaving room for things to continuously expand and evolve.

What masks look like love – in other words, what might be mistaken for love?

I drew the reversed Ten of Cups.

Love wears the masks that society has placed upon it. Society says that love is about marriage, children, white picket fences. And of course, sometimes love is vibrantly held within these definitions. But these things do not always reflect love. Love goes beyond definitions and structures. Love is boundless, showing up in all sorts of ways, moving to its own rhymes.

What unconscious emotions can love evoke?

I drew the Nine of Cups reversed.

Love can lead me to a more direct understanding of what I really want. Love asks me to sit with what I think I want and see how that lines up with what actually makes me happy. Love asks me to consider what I thought would bring me fulfillment verses what actually DOES bring me fulfillment. In this way, love is a teacher that brings me into a more refined and nuanced understanding of the emotions lurking beyond my surface.

Where is the need to love MYSELF more consciously?

I drew the Eight of Pentacles.

Lately, I’ve been working to love myself in very concrete ways: by eating lots of vegetables. By engaging in the activities I really care about. By working on my business. By keeping the promises I make to myself. I can show myself love through my direct actions, by approaching these things with not a sense of duty but a sense of devotion.

Where is the need to love OTHERS more consciously?

I drew the Ace of Pentacles reversed.

Sometimes it feels awkward to reach out to others. I do often fall into the trap of wishing someone else would take the initiative. It can make me uncomfortable for me to take the first step, to set the plans, to be proactive. But by being willing to be the instigator, by showing a concrete commitment to keep up connections, I can bring more consciousness to my love for others.

What beliefs about love should I re-evaluate?

I drew the Nine of Pentacles.

Love isn’t about appearances. Love isn’t about how lavishly someone praises me, or even how much they validate me. In fact, I often learn more about love from those who challenge me (as described with the Five of Wands). I can reevaluate any notions that love is supposed to keep me safely grounded in my comfort zone. Love is there to build me up, and the process of being built up doesn’t always feel comfortable.

How can I align more authentically with love?

I drew the Knight of Pentacles reversed.

Instead of focusing so intently on myself, on my own insecurities and issues…I can align more authentically with love by focusing more on others. By setting the intention to encourage those who need a boost. By remembering to let people be who they really are instead of who I suppose they should be. As I give other people the support to align themselves with love, I also give myself the ability to align with love.

***

If you answer these questions for yourself, I’d be quite interested to hear any insights you’d like to share. Feel free to leave a comment on the post and let me know.

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Is your work good enough to save the world?

February 7th, 2017

A few thoughts on creating, working and contributing to the world in your own way.

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