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The Magical Person’s Guide To Interacting With Muggles
If you are kinda witchy or new-age or really fall anywhere on the magical spectrum, it’s likely that at some point you’ve had challenges interacting with muggles (non-magical people). I work with a lot of folks who are just starting to “come out of the broom closet” and are squeamish about approaching this topic with their muggle cohorts.
I’ve had personal experience with this as well. Only about five years ago, I was terrified to tell the muggles in my life that I was a tarot reader. Now I’ve reached a point where I (mostly) have a handle on telling muggles what I do, but it hasn’t been an easy road. So today I’m going to share a few tips that might help you interact with your muggle friends, family and acquaintances… it’s almost like I’m Professor Mallon teaching Muggle Studies at Hogwarts (#dreamjob)!
Do not assume that muggles will judge you harshly.
This is something I find myself telling my clients all the time. The truth is that even muggles have a little bit of magic (they just don’t know it) and most of them can sense the energy that YOU bring when you interact with them. If you go into a conversation with a muggle assuming that they are going to think your magical tendencies are bizarre, you will likely project this insecurity outward, they will pick up on it…and then they WILL think it’s bizarre!
This is why it’s so important to cultivate a sense of internal approval about your magical path. You have to know that you don’t need the muggle’s approval. I’ve found that just as they can sense your insecurities, muggles can also sense when you are confident and secure. If you approach a conversation with them and embody an energy of self-approval, they will pick up on that. This doesn’t mean they’ll automatically approve of your magical path, but they’ll often at least get that you’re happy with what you’re doing, and if they really care about you, that will be enough to satisfy them.
Do not try to convince muggles to believe what you believe.
Here is an interesting irony: many of us come to eclectic magical paths because we do not like the strict dogma of traditional religious paths. Yet once we’ve formed our own magical beliefs, we might then try to convince other people that what WE believe is the truth! If you approach a skeptical muggle and try to badger them into understanding your belief system, it’s probably just going to end with both of you frustrated. I mean, how do you feel when muggles try to force you into their belief systems?
There is a whole wide spectrum of humans in this world, muggle and otherwise, who believe a whole wide spectrum of things, and that’s okay. Trying to convince people that your beliefs are valid is usually just a waste of your energy. Live and let live, agree to disagree.
Set muggle boundaries.
There are some muggles you might choose not to reveal your magical nature to. If you sense that it is in any way not safe for you to disclose this part of yourself, remember that you are in no obligation to do so. I’ve talked to a lot of magical people who feel like if they don’t tell EVERY muggle they encounter about their magic, they are being inauthentic. I strongly disagree. This is not being inauthentic – it’s having boundaries, and boundaries are essential.
You are NOT obligated to share your magical nature with anyone unless you choose to do so. If you know in your heart that keeping this part of yourself separate from anyone for any reason is best, trust yourself. You don’t owe anyone an explanation of who you are. Sometimes your intuition will pull you to be honest with muggles about this aspect of yourself. Other times your intuition will advise you to keep your spirituality sacred and secret. Only you can determine which approach is best at any given time.
When you do choose to share the magical part of yourself, the muggles that you’re close with – real friends, and non-shitty family members – should love you regardless of how baffling they find your magic. They might not ever really get it, they might not ever start reading tarot or doing full moon rituals themselves. They might be confused or even grumpy about it. But if they really care about you, they need to be willing to accept you for who you are.
I would be remiss not to acknowledge that there may be some muggles in your life who have an unnecessary amount of vitriol about magic. Those who insist on judging you harshly likely have their own internal issues they need to sort through, and as the old saying goes: it’s probably not so much about you, it’s about them. The best way to handle these muggles is (say it with me now) by having boundaries.
Identifying and enforcing your boundaries takes practice and an unwavering commitment to yourself. Examples of boundaries you might set with muggles in your life include: it’s okay to disagree with me, it is not okay to berate me. It is okay to believe differently than me, it is not okay to tell me my beliefs are “wrong.” As Oprah says, you teach people how to treat you. If a muggle repeatedly ignores your boundaries, that’s when it’s time to re-evaluate their role in your life.
Muggles gonna muggle.
Haters gonna hate, magicians gonna make magic, and muggles gonna muggle. That is to say, most muggles are totally wrapped up in living their own muggle lives, and most of them won’t give you much attention either way. I point this out because when you’re just beginning to open up about your magic, you might tend to ruminate about what muggles will say, what they will think, and how they will react. In reality, most muggles aren’t giving you much thought at all, they’re too occupied ruminating on their own narrative. For better or for worse, we are all the center of our own story, and it’s actually kind of liberating to remember that most muggles aren’t really thinking about you at all.
Embrace muggles’ curiosity.
Don’t assume that all muggles are closed-minded! In five years of revealing myself to various muggles, the most common reaction I get is curiosity. A lot of muggles have never been exposed to magic, and they might just want to ask you some questions and figure out what this is all about. You never know when you’ll come across a muggle who senses the magic dormant within themselves, and seeing you take ownership of your magic just might inspire them to do the same.
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Finding Home (again and again and again)
pictured: Finding Home zine by Annie Ruygt
I have this reoccurring pattern of getting lost and feeling like I’m not quite dwelling in the center of myself. Lately one of the things that’s been helping me with this is making doodles about what’s going on in my inner world, and today I drew this map to represent the current terrain of my psyche:
I’m currently re-reading The Power of Myth by Joseph Campbell with Bill Moyers. There’s a part where Campbell quotes Novalis, a 19th century poet who described the place where your inner world and outer worlds meet as “the seat of your soul.” That little HOME star at the center of my map is the seat of my soul. The other stuff is what I find myself trudging through to get back there.
I’ve been at this journey long enough to be certain that this quest to find HOME, to find the seat of my soul, is basically the theme of my entire life. It’s come up for me again…and again. Oh and look, now again!
I don’t want this to be a “woe is me” post, because the truth is that on some level I can always sense an undercurrent of meaning in all of this. Even when I’m mired in the fog of fear or tucked away on the isle of apathy, there’s always a sense that HOME is still there. The only time it’s reaaallllly hard to tap into the undercurrent of meaning is when I’m in that wretched desert of depression. That place is no joke.
Somehow, even though I keep going through these unpleasant terrains time and time again, I keep finding my way back home. It is a tender process. It can be a confusing process. The specifics of navigation vary depending on the exact circumstances. But I’ve picked up some wisdom along the way, and eventually, I find my way back home.
I think part of the reason I’ve become intimately acquainted with this landscape ties into the work I’m here to do in this world. All of the points on this map are universal aspects of the human experience that manifest uniquely for each one of us. My clients are often going through their own seas of self-doubts and groves of glumness. It would be arrogant to say I can totally understand the individual traits of this territory for anyone but myself, but I do think my direct experience gives me a useful empathy for other people’s journeys.
One of the most important things for me lately has been remembering not to freak out about the fact that I’m a little lost. There’s a quote that’s always stuck with me, I can’t find the source but I think it was a Buddhist monk who said something like: there will always be suffering, but you don’t need to suffer over the suffering. In this instance, suffering over the suffering would look like “OMFGGGG I’m tripping over the sediment of old stories once again, OMG NO WHY this can’t be happening, I thought I already overcame this?!? NOOOO!”
It’s much better to be honest and curious – not panicked – about where you are. “Hmm, I see I’m tripping on the sediment of old stories again. That’s interesting. I wonder how I might progress from here?” Is a much more effective approach than suffering over the suffering.
I know from past experience that I have to be really honest with myself about what’s going on. It’s always tempting to try to convince myself that I’m fine and that everything is really good, no problem, nothing to see here! But ignoring the lostness just makes it even worse and more confusing and more tricky. You’ve got to look right at it.
Another thing that’s been quite good for me lately is reminding myself of the things that have helped me in the past. This requires me to be really patient and gentle with myself, but also really straightforward and authoritative. Carrie, love, I see that you’re lost again. Perhaps it might help to return to that book that shifted your perspective once before? Or return to that fulfilling creative endeavor you abandoned?
(This explains why I’m re-reading The Power of Myth and doodling again even though I’ve long been convinced I can’t draw.)
Due to the impeccable timing of the universe, I also recently received a lovely little zine from my friend Annie. It’s called Finding Home: Tips and Encouragement to Help You Create a Roadmap to Your Self. In the pages of this zine, Annie gives poignant advice on practicing magical self-love. Finding messages in dreams, connecting with the moon and brewing your own teas are just a few of the topics covered here.
Essentially, Annie’s zine walks you through creating a map that is a sort of antidote to the map that I posted above. The zine is available on Annie’s site for only $5, and I do recommend it if you enjoy incorporating mystical elements into your self-care practice.
(Annie and I are also working on a reaaaalllllly exciting project together. We haven’t officially announced it yet but we will be soon and your hints are that she’s an artist and I’m a tarot reader and eeeep!!)
So, this is where I am. I see it, and I accept it. And I know that I will keep finding home again. And again. And again.
Because that’s just what I do.
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Are You Being Led By Spirit or Dragged By Ego?
If you can see your path laid out in front of you step by step,
you know it’s not your path.
Your own path you make with every step you take.
-Joseph Campbell
I’ve experienced the truth of that quote above again and again (and AGAIN!), and it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. Your ego very much wants to see the entire path laid out in front of you. Your ego wants to know exactly where you’re going and what to expect along the way. But if you want to live a heart-centered life of adventure and spirit-guided experiences, your ego kind of needs to STFU.
The longer I’m at this whole “living life as a human thing” the more clear I am that embracing an authentic path means accepting the unknown. Bushwhacking your way through the wilderness instead of relying on the well-worn trails.
Today I offer up episode 13 of the Key Finding Podcast. In this episode we consider the question: how do you know if you’re being dragged by ego or led by spirit? I describe how cards 7-10 of the tarot’s major arcana – The Chariot, Strength, The Hermit and the Wheel of Fortune – speak to the nuances of this distinction.
Download or stream on Soundcloud below, or search ‘Key Finding’ wherever you listen to podcasts:
Now to talk about something bittersweet. TLDR version: This is the final episode of Key Finding. I talk about this near the end of the episode. More details below if you are interested.
When I started the podcast, I gave myself permission to think of it as an experiment. I wanted to try something new, but I didn’t want to feel stuck if it didn’t feel right. Before I even started Key Finding, my spirit was like “yo, you should really get a co-host instead of doing this alone, you’ll enjoy it much more if you’re collaborating.” But my ego was like “nah it’s all good I’m just gonna press forward.”
You’d think I’d have learned not to ignore my intuition by now, but what can I say? This shit is hard sometimes!
There are many things I have enjoyed about doing the podcast. I’ve enjoyed sharing my thoughts in a new format. I’ve enjoyed extending my confidence in my speaking abilities. Most of all, I’ve enjoyed hearing from those of you who have been listening and liking the content.
But something has felt a little ‘off’ about the podcast. I miss writing. I have a hard time talking to myself for 35-40 minutes (#introvert #talkingtoyourselfisweird). So even though my ego is feeling kinda iffy about this whole thing, I am tuning back into my spirit.
And of course, since Joseph Campbell was right all along, I don’t yet know exactly what my path will look like going forward. But I have a few ideas:
-I will return to writing posts on my blog. I miss writing not only about tarot, but also about broader concepts of self-discovery, creativity, and connecting with wonder in the human experience.
-Audio versions may be created to accompany my written blog posts. This way I can keep up my speaking skills and also connect with those of you who prefer information in audio format.
-Another podcast may be on the horizon, this time with a collaborator. The wheels are in motion, but I’m not yet sure how/if/when this will happen. We shall see.
So many unknowns! I am fully in the energy of the Hermit and the Wheel of Fortune. It’s kind of uncomfortable not knowing exactly how all of this will go, but I trust that I am on my own weird, winding, authentic, magical path.
If you’re not already on my email list, sign up below to stay up-to-date with what my soul leads me to create going forward. Thank you for being here!
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Synchronicity: Being Real About How You Spend Your Time (Key Finding 012)
Partake in a serving of synchronicity today as I pull some cards and let them spark the conversation! Topics covered include:
- being brutally honest with yourself when you make excuses for not getting things done
- strategies for doing more of what you really WANT to do with your time
- how to hold yourself to realistic expectations
Plus, some real talk about the future of this podcast.
Leave a comment below and lemme know what you think!
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Running a Business: Hard-Won Lessons & Personal Growth (Key Finding 011)
Let’s get down to business, shall we? I get asked about running a business a lot. So today, I’m gonna share with you some of the lessons I have learned in my own business journey.
Topics covered include:
- why you shouldn’t be ashamed of staying in your day job
- the connection between your business and your self-worth
- handling self-doubt in business
- navigating the capitalist paradigm when it doesn’t align with your values
- and so much more!
Download or stream here, or search ‘Key Finding’ wherever you listen to podcasts:
RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert
The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron
A Small Orange Web Hosting
What do you think? If you have thoughts or questions about this episode, leave a comment below and let’s chat!
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How to Give a Meaningful Tarot Reading (Key Finding 010)
Welcome back to Key Finding and HAPPY 2018! In this episode, I share a collection of tips, strategies and insights to help you give other people meaningful tarot readings. Take what resonates with you, and leave the rest!
Topics covered include:
- Understanding your intentions as a tarot reader
- What to do when you ‘draw a blank’
- How to set your energy before beginning a reading
- Three specific strategies to make your readings actionable and transformative
Listen or stream here, or search ‘Key Finding’ wherever you listen to podcasts:
RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Four Steps to ‘Get in the Zone’ for a Tarot Reading
Marie Forleo on where you shine your light
Mary K Greer on the Biddy Tarot Podcast
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Dreams & Themes eBook is HERE (despite Mercury retrograde)
*Deep breath*
Wheeeeeeeeeeewwwwwww.
So yesterday was the big day. Dreams & Themes for 2018 was officially released into the world! If you pre-ordered a copy, you should have received an email with your eBook yesterday (or maybe two emails).
The problem is, Mercury is in goddamn retrograde. A few people who pre-ordered have emailed me saying they didn’t get either of the two messages I sent out yesterday. If you pre-ordered and have not received your copy yet, PLEASE email me directly, [email protected], and I’ll get you sorted out ASAP.
I am at my wits end when it comes to figuring out why some of my emails aren’t going through. At this point I’m just trying to breathe! I poured my heart and soul into creating this eBook so this is kind of stressful. But, we’ll figure it out. Mercury, I shall overcome your shenanigans!
The good news is that if you have NOT yet purchased the eBook, you can get it right now for $18 and download it instantly! That option is working just fine, it’s just the pre-orders I’m having some issues with.
The other good news is that I’m satisfied with how this project turned out. It is not perfect, but it is genuine, and I believe it is useful. I hope you will feel the love that went into the creation.
Tarot is so incredible for clarifying your intentions and expanding your awareness, and this eBook is a great way to facilitate that process as you head into the New Year. I truly hope it serves you well!
Thank you so much for your patience and support.
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Tarot for the New Year with Shonna Hill (Key Finding 009)
I’m excited to be joined today by Shonna Hill! Shonna creates tarot apps and facilitates a huge tarot community on Facebook. Join us as we nerd out and talk about using tarot to dream, plan and energetically prepare for 2018!
RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Dreams and Themes for 2018 ebook
Tarot Nerds on Facebook
Galaxy Tone Apps
Ace of Stars Tarot
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Dreams & Themes for 2018 Ebook
Dreams and Themes for 2018 will get you geared up as you head into the uncharted wilderness of 2018.
There is real power in approaching life with intention and awareness. This is one of the reasons I’m so enamored by tarot – the cards are extraordinarily useful in helping you clarify your intentions and expand your awareness. There’s a vigorous collective energy conducive to this type of practice around the New Year, and I want to help you immerse yourself in these “planning and dreaming and envisioning” vibes.
Introducing Dreams and Themes for 2018, a PDF ebook which supports you in using tarot to explore the themes of your upcoming year. Purchase now and download yours instantly for $18.
The ebook is composed of three sections. The first section walks you through using your own tarot cards to reflect on 2017 as well as look forward to 2018. You’ll be guided through potent tarot activities designed to bring your personal dreams and energetic themes for the new year into the light.
The second section is a gathering of collective energy tarot readings for each month of 2018. These readings are written by me, with the intention of highlighting energetic themes that will be applicable to all of us in different ways. Think of this as a way to receive wisdom that is both deeply personal as well as universally relevant.
The third section guides you in monthly reflection. You can return to this section at the end of every month to process and integrate!
If you love using tarot and like finding creative ways to approach your life, I think you’ll love this ebook!
Dreams and Themes for 2018 is a PDF file, available to purchase now. Once your purchase is confirmed, you’ll receive a link to download your eBook instantly.
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Soothing Our Frazzled Nerves through Synchronicity (Key Finding 008)
Join me as I pull some cards for the collective…especially if your nerves have been kind of frazzled lately (as mine have). This is pretty different than previous episodes of the podcast. Instead of having an ‘outline’ or predetermined focus area, I left it up to the power of synchronicity. The cards led me to talk about:
-reprogramming your self-destructive tendencies
-identifying your unhelpful behaviors so that we can be a greater force for good
-why creativity is essential now more than ever
-why it is so important to hold space for ALL aspects of yourself
Download or stream the episode here:
Let me know what you think about this episode. Should I do more of this kind of thing? Leave a comment and share your thoughts:
RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
How to read reversed tarot cards
My Wild Unknown interpretations
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Carrie Mallon
Header art from The Spacious Tarot illustrated by Annie Ruygt
All site content © Carrie Mallon LLC 2014-2019
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